Saturday, February 3, 2007

I fucked it up ...

Oh my god, I am so stupid. If anyone told me that I could be so foolish before, I wouldn't have believed it. Now I know what I am capable of.

I looked at the voting yesterday evening and it was already at over 300 more positive than negative votes. You can possible imagine how excited I was! After over a month without an orgasm and almost no stimulation I would finally be allowed to cum. And those 5 minutes would have made a good orgasm for sure.

I was alone at home and thinking about this orgasm occupied my mind completely. And although my master and lover told me every day that I am not allowed to touch my pussy at all, I couldn't resist it anymore. I wanted to feel at least the incredible wetness between my legs.

I reached inside my pants. The first touch felt like an explosion. My clit reacted instantly to the soft touch of my fingers. I just circled around my clit with my index finger and it felt so good. I never thought I could get so wet down there.

The good thing is, I could stop myself in time and didn't go any further. It was very hard for me, but I managed to pull my hand out of my pants again before I could do anything even more stupid.

I instantly knew that I have to tell my master and lover about this incident. I could only hope his punishment wouldn't be too severe. But it never came to any confession from my side anyway. A few minutes after the incident my mobile phone rang. It was him. I shivered when I picked up the phone. Could he knew what happened?

His voice was very angry. He told me that failure will not be tolerated and that I can expect appropriate punishment for what I did. How could he know what happened? Maybe there is a hidden camera in our house, otherwise I would not know how he could have gotten that information so quickly. This would also explain a few other strange things he said during the last weeks.

In the end it doesn't matter where he got his information from, the only thing that matters is that I broke the rules and will be punished accordingly. I have no idea what he is up to, but I expect the punishment to be severe. I really hope to get my orgasm anyway, but I doubt it at the moment. How could I fail so close before the final goal? I cannot believe it.

He will not be at home before tomorrow, and I didn't talk to him since this last phone call. In the end he mentioned that I should confess my failure here and that I should ask you for appropriate punishment. He has something on his mind already for me, but he is open to any suggestions. And I am not allowed to ask for mildness this time.

The voting is on hold until I get further instructions.


Anonymous said...

I think an appropriate punishment would be to reduce the time by the amount you took. I think the "failure" is balanced out (over-balanced, really) by the non-consensual, non-informed spying.

Anonymous said...

An interesting punishment would be to use the total number of votes as seconds of stimulation. After a while, stimulation would cease to become pleasant, and become unpleasant, maybe even painful.

Anonymous said...

You broke the rules and you should be punished hard. If I was your master, I would not let you have your orgasm. He should consider putting you into chastity, if you are not able to control yourself otherwise.

Anonymous said...

The consensuality of this relationship is already questionable. If she was in chastity, she wouldn't even be able to leave him.

Delwin said...

Punishments come in all sorts. Your master can choose to either spank you hard enough for your body to remember next time you get that kind of nasty urges, or he can choose to take away something you really want... Would you like it (for example) if you were to have twice as much "yes" as "no" votes to even consider touching yourself, in the future? (This is something you really want, touching yourself... isn't it?)

But what I think you should do, Kirsten, is suggest a punishment for yourself and ask us whether or not we think it's enough. If it is, you get the punishment and the 5 minutes of stimulation, and if it isn't, you get the punishment and suggest another punishment for yourself until you get it right. (no touch rule until you get it right, obviously)

But of course, this is all for your master to decide.

God said...

I think an appropriate punishement would be a session of CBT at the hands of a skilled dominatrix for spying on you with a hidden camera.

All kidding aside--I hope to myself you're actually having fun with all this.

Anonymous said...

Embarassing pictures. Lots of them.

Anonymous said...

Your punishment should be to discard all the negative votes, so you get 1100 seconds of stimulation or whatever the voting was up to. The catch would be that the stimulation would stop as soon as you came close to an orgasm. After this session, voting would start over with 0 votes for and against your orgasm. As a bit of a bonus though, the session would be longer than 5 minutes, so by your earlier agreement, you'd have to tape it. That might convince more people to vote for you in hopes of getting another video.

Good luck :)

Kirsten said...

I was told to thank you all for the inspiring suggestions. My master and lover decided that an orgasm is out of question after my failure. Therefore he decided that he will combine the chastity idea with the stimulation session without an orgasm. Possibly the worst combination for me.

Anonymous said...

i really dont think what is happening to you is fair or right. if he is doing this to you, he is not your lover and master. leave him.